tmi about my scars, heads up!

not going to lie, i’m kind of anxious about my appointment on friday! my scars have been bothering me a lot as of lately, and to be honest, nothing i’ve been using over the past couple of months have really been effectual. i’m really not expecting that whatever she tells me should be groundbreaking; i’ve almost come to terms with their permanence, but there’s always that sliver of hope that i have that maybe something can be done? perhaps. maybe it’s just wishful thinking. but they’ve been causing actual, physical discomfort lately (as opposed to just my mental qualms, hm) to the point that it’s kind of difficult to ignore. aah, we’ll see. little side note but i saw a woman at church last week with the exact scar on her chest, though faded in color and less prominent. so maybe? aah. there are just moments when i wish i could forget about it, wear whatever i want in the summer, at the beach, wear dresses without worry… i know, it’s trivial, not worth the time to dwell, but ah! it’s always been a touchy subject but i’ll be honest: i don’t think about them half as much as i used to. which has been nice! it has been.

if everything goes accordingly i will be going to the young the giant show at the end of this week with my boyfriend. i’m really excited! they’re kind of.. our band? in a way! but definitely—good memories associated with their music, especially strings! i remember the start of our talking phase when we were both so in love with the open session video for that song, to the extent that i practically bothered nate every day for a cover of it! (.. in fact, let me just pull that video up ..) which he complied to, at some point, and i just thought it was the sweetest thing. ha is it too early to be reminiscing? but yeah, definitely some good times can be traced back to young the giant. it’ll be amazing if it all goes through, ah! i miss him. haha, there, i said it. can’t wait.

busy week, school-wise. lots of quizzes/tests friday, so gotta hang in there until then! buying my dress today, officially! i feel awful about spending money, yikesss. i mean, it’s bound guaranteed to happen when you’re planning a debut, but ah! and i will leave you there so i can get to my homework. so long!